FatherDaughter Talk
by imdoingthiswhy
Summary: A conversation between Castle and Beckett, and a decision after Meredith left - followed by another between Castle and Alexis.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

She stood at the edge of the living room as Castle bustled around taking out things in the kitchen to make breakfast and basically talking to himself, since she was lost in her own head. She caught something about being glad that Meredith would soon be an entire ocean away from his life, but not much else registered. She wasn't even aware that the smile she had put on for his benefit had faded enough for him to notice.

"Kate? Are you all right?"

She came close enough back to the moment to realize he was putting a quick breakfast on the table.

"Kate?"

She could hear the concern in his voice. "I'm fine. It looks good. Thank you."

He sat next to her at the bar in the kitchen, watching as she spread some jelly on her toast and had some with her coffee. As she started on the scrambled eggs, he asked, "Are you going to tell me?"

"Tell you what?"

"Where you drifted off to just now."

"She almost got me, Castle."

"Who almost got you? Never mind. Meredith again, right?"

"She almost had me doubting us, but I'm not."

"What did she do now? I'm _sooo_ sorry about all this." He paused and gave her a proud look. "But whatever it was, it didn't work?"

"Nope. She's good, but I'm better," Kate answered smugly. "Like I said, she's fun and dynamic and hard to say no to, but I spent a lot of the time we were at dinner last night basically saying just that. Conversation was fun, but I know when I'm being interrogated; and she didn't get much personal information about us out of me. Once she realized that wasn't happening and I got her to talk about herself, or you, it was easier to make it fun. I'm not bad at turning around an interrogation."

"What did she do to leave you in another dimension when she flitted out the door this morning?"

"After she asked you to get her purse…"

"I knew I shouldn't have left her alone with you. What…"

"I asked her why things didn't work between you…and I'm sorry. I handled that badly. I should have asked you…but, regardless, it happened. She compared the romance and excitement in your marriage to a sweet soufflé. She said you knew enough about her to write a million novels, but she didn't know enough about you to fill a pamphlet…that it just wasn't enough for her…said soufflés are wonderful, but sooner or later, they always fall. She mentioned asking you about your father and not getting an answer, and I realized we haven't talked much about your past, either. That's where I was right after she left."

"Hmmph! Didn't mention she cheated on me, huh? That pretty well felled the soufflé." He ran his fingers through his hair in frustration.

"It's okay. I see it now for what it was. The whole time she was answering me, she was preening, twisting her hair…acting…looking innocent…trying to get into my head. And the nutmeg..." Kate rolled her eyes.

"I really don't think she meant anything by it. Just her memory of how I used to like my coffee."

"You really think so? She was sitting here barely dressed, legs stretched out for the best view…letting me know how comfortable she still feels wandering around your home in front of you in her underwear…overtly didn't take the hint when I said something about putting pants on. And where do you keep the nutmeg?"

"Over there, in the spice rack. You know that. Why?"

"It was close enough to her that she could put it in your coffee without leaving the bar stool…barely even having to stretch her arm out. Nobody cooked last night, and when we went to bed, everything in the kitchen was in place. She had it there intentionally…so she could mention your having all nighters and making you special coffee afterward. It was planned for me. And obviously, you still like coffee that way. If you want, I can serve you coffee with…"

"No." He sounded almost harsh. "I don't want you to do that. When I'm with you, the last thing I want to think about is an ex-wife."

"Good. Neither do I."

He took both her hands in his, and said, "Leave your luggage and stay tonight…please. We'll talk. You can ask me anything you want about my marriages…or whatever else crosses your mind. It may not all be pleasant to hear, but I'll tell you the truth."

"We're good, Castle. She just wanted to make me feel as insecure as she does. And I don't want to interrogate you. I do trust you, and I'm sure I know you better than Meredith does. If something comes up, I just want you to answer it, not deflect it. I'll try to do the same. People think you put your life right out there, but you don't. You give them just enough to feel like you do, but you keep a lot to yourself; and I know you have your own hurts and betrayals to live with. I can't help you the way you've helped me if I don't know what they are. And I want to do that for you. We're doing this together, remember? So prepare to have your past slowly stalked the way you stalked mine."

He leaned in and kissed her forehead lovingly. "I love you so much," he breathed next to her ear as he pulled her into his arms.

"That's why I want to know…and help. Because I love you, too."

He pulled back and looked at her, saw the truth of what she had said in her eyes. Then he kissed her, long and slow, channeling all the joy he felt at hearing the words into their kiss. "Please stay tonight?"

She slid off the bar stool and stood in the vee of his legs, her arms still around his neck. "Yeah, I'll come back tonight. I asked your mother about pictures of you when you were little. She told me where to find them, but with the Meredith thing happening, I didn't get to the album yet. Maybe tonight we could start there...easy stuff. You can tell me the stories behind the pictures."

"Anything you want to know. I promise."

Don't worry about coming in to the precinct today. You need to be here with Alexis."

"Mother has to be at her acting school this morning, but she has someone to cover everything in the afternoon. Maybe I'll come in after lunch."

"I'll miss you."

"Because?" he asked playfully, fishing to hear the words again.

She grinned at the joy that accompanied the playful look he gave her, knowing what he wanted to hear. "Because I love you." One more little peck on the lips, and she picked up her keys and left.

After she left, he did a little victory dance around the kitchen, as unable to stop himself from smiling as he showered and dressed for the day as Kate was as she drove to work and tried to get her job done at the precinct.

xxxxx

"She's been thinking about you all morning," Esposito informed Castle, falling into step with him as he walked off the elevator with two coffees. Ryan joined them as he left the break room with his own coffee.

"Has she been talking about me?" Castle asked.

"No, but she's been fighting off a big, goofy smile all morning. We know it's you," Ryan answered.

"Just keep making her happy, Bro'. We know where to find you if you hurt her," Esposito warned, one finger pointed at Castle's face. He softened the gesture with a friendly slap on Castle's shoulder, though. He and Ryan peeled away then and returned to their desks.

"What was that about?" Beckett asked with a smile as she took her coffee.

"Another friendly warning that I'd better keep the big, goofy smile on your face." When she raised eyebrows in question, he explained. "The one they said you'd been fighting off since you got here. They told me you'd been thinking about me all morning."

"That bad, huh?"

"Were they right?"

"Yeah."

"Good. Imagine I just kissed you," he said from behind his coffee cup.

"Behave."

"If I have to," he answered with his signature smirk. "What have we got? Anything new?"

"Not much. We found a few names in the phone records. Ryan's checking them now. We have a co-worker our victim didn't get along with coming in this afternoon. He should be here in about half an hour. That's about it."

"Everything is on the board?"

"Yep."

"So we have half an hour to kill?"

"Yep." She stopped for a moment, folding her hands together on her desk. "Castle, I think we need to go ahead and tell Gates about us. Meredith knows, and she talks…a lot. If she says something to the wrong people…and she knows a lot of them…"

"God, I hadn't thought about that, but you're right."

"We've kept things professional here, but too many people already know. I don't want a news report to come out before the captain hears it from us. Hearing it at all could be bad enough. Hearing it like that would probably be disastrous."

"Do you want to tell her now?"

"Right before we go home this afternoon? I think I want the option of getting out as fast as possible."

He laughed. "Okay. Right before we go home. What's your honest opinion of how it will go?"

"I honestly don't have a clue, but I think it's time."

"Me, too. I'm not good at hiding things that make me as happy as us."

"I'm apparently having trouble with that, too. "How is Alexis?"

"About the same. The fever is worse in the morning for some reason. It's usually the other way 'round. She was feeling a little better when I left…asked if you would be coming over tonight."

"Maybe I shouldn't? She's sick. She might want you all to herself."

"No. She seemed to be glad you were coming. And you know I am."

"Hey, here's the names from the phone records," Ryan told them as he walked toward Beckett's desk. "One is a dry cleaner. The other two are women, both married. Haven't made any connections yet, but we're leaving now. We're going to check with neighbors, see if any of them have seen our victim around any of these places."

"Okay. Thanks. The co-worker should be here any time. Castle will sit in with me."

The interview produced some new information but nothing that could yet be called evidence. When the boys returned later in the afternoon, they all coordinated their new information and added it to the board. It was nearly five when they finished, and there were a couple of possible connections that they decided they could run down the next morning. The boys picked up their coats and went home.

Castle and Beckett looked at each other, and he asked, "Ready?"

"No, but it has to happen sometime. You think she already knows?"

"She might. She's pretty sharp. I just hope this doesn't turn into one of those 'Don't ask, don't tell' moments. Are you really ready to face possible dismissal?"

"I think so. I feel like we've been waiting for the boom to fall for the past few months, and we're both tired of it. Even if we're done here, we aren't done with each other."

"You're certain enough of us to take a chance on your career?"

"Yeah," she answered, surprising both of them with her confidence. "You're not backing out on us now, are you?"

"Never."

"Then let's go and face Iron Gates." She took a deep breath and walked toward Gates' office, with Castle close behind her.

Standing at the door, Beckett knocked and said, "Captain, we need to talk to you."

"Come in. Close the door if it's as serious as the two of you look." Castle closed the door behind him, and the captain looked curious. "What do we need to talk about?"

After their conversation with the captain, the result was the conclusion that Castle is an unpaid, civilian consultant and that the captain would not ask her not to date a civilian. That was presented with the caveat that adjustments might need to be made if the partner aspect of their professional relationship became a personnel issue among the other members of the force.

"Thank you, sir." Castle answered.

"Thank you, captain," Beckett added.

"Now go home…whatever that means now. I won't ask," Gates told them.

"Yes, sir." Beckett answered with a small smile.

Castle opened the door for his partner, and where the captain could see, his hand went to the small of Beckett's back as they returned to her desk; but that small gesture was the only thing he allowed himself. He helped her with her coat as he asked, "Did I understand that I can still work with you?"

"That's how it sounded," she answered with a big smile as she pulled her hair to the outside of her coat's collar. "It was much easier than I had imagined."

"Yeah. Whew!" was his answer.

"You know what the best part is?" she asked as the elevator doors closed behind them.

"What?"

"Now I can claim you when I want to. There are waaay too many women out there who think you're still available."

"But they're all mistaken," he answered, giving her a little peck on the lips. "Let's go home."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The night before had been fun. After Martha and Alexis went to bed, Kate and Castle snuggled on the sofa and went through the photo album. As he promised, he told her what he knew about the pictures, some bringing sad or painful memories, but mostly sweet, fun, or funny ones. Kate asked related questions now and then but managed to keep it more like a walk down Memory Lane than an interrogation. They both woke up that morning feeling good about where they were now.

Kate finished her coffee as Alexis reached the top of the stairs, and Castle saw a look on her face that told him she wasn't yet comfortable with being there when his daughter woke up first thing in the morning. He knew being there with his mother didn't bother her anymore, but Alexis hadn't been at home that much, and it seemed to feel different when it was his daughter.

As she put her breakfast dishes in the dishwasher, Castle leaned against the kitchen counter and said quietly and lovingly, "I'll talk to her this morning…make sure she understands."

Turning toward him, she answered, "It still feels like I'm invading her space. I know it's going to eventually work itself out. I'm just not quite there yet, and I'm still not quite sure how she feels about it."

"I know. It's okay." He cupped her cheek in his hand and gave her a soft, chaste but loving kiss, and a little louder, said, "I'll see you in a couple of hours."

"Okay," she answered, then gave him a big smile, a little kiss on the cheek, and whispered in his ear, "I love you." She grabbed her keys and checked her badge and gun. "Morning, Alexis," she called on her way out the door as Alexis entered the kitchen.

"She didn't leave because of me, did she?" Alexis asked.

"No. It doesn't bother her to still be here when you go to bed, but having you wake up and find her here still feels a little uncomfortable for her. This morning she was just trying to get to work early, though. We talked to Gates about us yesterday, and…"

"Finally. What did she say?"

"Looks like we're still okay at the precinct, for the near future, anyway. Anyhow, we told her right at the end of the day and got out of there fast before Gates could change her mind. Kate left some of her paperwork unfinished when we left and wanted to get it done this morning before the captain felt the need to come looking for it."

"Why haven't you asked Kate to marry you, Dad?" Alexis asked as she poured herself a glass of orange juice. "You've never brought a woman home to stay with you unless you married her, and I know you love her more than you loved either of them."

"It's co…"

"I'm sick, and I don't have the patience for that 'It's complicated' line again. It shouldn't be complicated. You're both obviously in love. You've been together more than half of the past year, you've known each other for over four years. It should be the logical next step."

"You'd be okay with that?" he asked quietly.

"Do I _sound_ like I'm trying to discourage the idea?" she asked, sitting down with him at the table and giving him her impatient face, accompanied with a little eye roll. "I'd be fine with it."

"Are you okay with the way things are now for a little longer?" he asked, hopefully, getting up to put bread in the toaster and scramble her some eggs."

"I'm okay with seeing you happy, and you are, but I know you want more. Maybe I just want to see her make a commitment. She's hurt you so many times. I guess it makes me nervous…kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop. It does feel different now, though. I really like her, Dad, and I want to trust her with you; but you're my dad, and I'm not here to help now, and I haven't seen anybody able to hurt you the way she can."

"Nobody has made me happier, either." He turned and smiled at her reassuringly. "I've hurt her, too, honey. Neither of us intended to hurt the other. We just didn't talk about important things for a long time. That causes misunderstandings…missteps. We both come with emotional baggage...old wounds and old behaviors to get past. We've both lived with betrayals. Trust isn't easy for either of us, and we needed time to establish that…to be sure of what we have." He stopped and took a sip of his coffee, seemed to be thinking before he continued. "We're talking now…when there are problems. We're being honest about things…and patient with each other. We're working at it…both of us. I'm not sure you understand what she had to ask of herself to be here with us at Christmas. She told me she and her Dad hadn't opened their box of Christmas decorations since her mother died. She hadn't had a Christmas like this in all that time. She's trying hard…for me…for us."

"No Christmas for that long?"

She spent some time with her dad for the last few years, but more than likely, just lunch and a little time together. None of the trimmings. She always works on Christmas. That's been _her_ tradition all these years."

Alexis watched her dad move efficiently around the kitchen. "But she got out of it and braved a full-on Richard Castle Christmas…for you?"

"Yeah. I felt pretty special."

"We could tell," she responded with a teasing smile.

He smiled back, and put the plate with her eggs and toast in front of her. "Whoops. I forgot the silverware."

"So, how long will it be before I can say I have a step-mom?"

"You're hanging on to that question like a pit bull, aren't you?" he answered, sitting back down and handing her a knife and fork. "Does it bother you that we're finally working things out right when you've left for college? We didn't plan it that way. It's just when it happened."

"No. It kind of makes it easier for me to enjoy college. I know you're not alone, that Grams and Kate are both around when you need somebody. I know you can take care of yourself; but we've taken care of each other for such a long time…"

"I know. I feel the same way about you. I know you're independent and capable, but I can't help feeling like I've given up my little girl.

"What do you think she'd say if you asked her?"

"Aaaaaaand we're back to that."

Alexis grinned. "Have I ever been easy to distract?"

"No. I don't know what I was thinking." He laughed and took another sip of coffee. "I don't know what she'd say. I think it's what we both want eventually, but I don't know if she's ready for that big a commitment yet."

"Are you sure she loves you?"

"Yeah," he answered with a smile, remembering the whisper in his ear before she left.

"And you're sure she trusts you?"

"You were here through the Tyson case, right?"

"Right. So you're sure she loves you, and she trusts you, and neither of you are the least bit interested in seeing anybody else."

"That pretty well covers it."

"And you're sure she knows you love her and trust her."

"Yeah. She knows."

"Then, sorry, Dad, but I don't see a problem. It already looks like a commitment to me. Looks to me like all you need is a ring."

"It's in the wall safe in the study," he admitted, turning his mug back and forth with one finger on the handle. "I saw it in the jewelry case a few months ago when I was looking for a birthday gift for Mother, and it looked perfect for Kate, and…"

Alexis squealed in excitement. "Will you show me? How could you have had it that long and not have given it to her? And how could you not tell me?"

"I'm a coward? I don't know, Pumpkin. I guess I'm just afraid I'll burst the bubble if I move too fast. Come on. I'll show you." He went to the wall safe, got the ring box, and handed it to Alexis.

She took it eagerly but opened it slowly to savor the moment. "Dad, it's beautiful. It's a perfect compromise of what she'd probably want and what you'd want to give her. It's elegant, but it won't look overdone at work or underdone at big parties..."

"So I did okay?"

"Better than okay. It's perfect." She closed the box and handed it back to him.

As he started to put it back in the wall safe, he remembered Kate telling him she wanted someone to just dive in with; and he began to think Alexis might not be too far off course. He and Kate still had things to work out, but they were getting better at that; and with enough love and trust, it would happen. Maybe they _could_ just dive in.

"I think you should go ahead and ask her. It isn't like you're really rushing into anything. As long as you've known one another, there can't be too many annoying habits the two of you don't already know about. You practically read each other's minds, and I've never seen two people who love each other more than the two of you."

"And again you sound like the adult in the room. Not fair. But thank you for helping me think."

"So, what are you waiting for?"

He hugged her and kissed her head, imagining diving in. "The right moment, I guess. And I promise you'll be the first to know when I've found it."

"Don't worry, Dad," she answered with a sneaky, 'gotcha' look on her face, "I'll talk to her tonight…make sure she understands."


End file.
